10 Habits of Highly Effective Parents

One: Never make your kids your whole world, they are a separate person from you and they need their own space to grow and develop, whilst they did come from you and you may feel they are apart of you, they are in their own right a unique individual that exists in an entirely different world from you.

Two: Always take time out for yourself, you are not doing yourself or your child any favors by constantly running around after them in, this leads to exhaustion and no time for yourself. Love yourself, and you will love your child better.

Three: Don't assume that you always know what is best for your child, just because you are their parent does not make you an oracle, sometimes you need to discuss parenting issues with other adults or the child to gain a better perspective.

Four: Do not pressure your child into be something they do know want to be, i'e just because you want your child to be a football superstar, does not mean that he will want to be, he may want to be a ballerina, and you are going to have to learn accept that and be proud of it, otherwise both you and your child will be miserable.

Five: Whilst sometimes children need to be taught harsh lessons in life, it is also important to be sensitive to their feelings in other instances, we often forget what the first break up with a boyfriend/girlfriend is like, and for a child it can seem like their entire would is collapsing, we can forget that maturing is a process and a journey, and as parents its part of your job to assist them in the best way possible.

Six: Create firm boundaries for children that will allow them to try and understand the difference between right and wrong, boundaries need to be put in place to allow a certain amount of trust between children and parents, it is important that the parents are clear about boundaries, and if the child does break these, they need to understand that they may loose your trust and it is their job to win it back to create further freedom again

Seven: Always make time to share positive experiences and have fun with your kids, it helps to earn mutual respect and better opens communicative pathways. Remember that the better the communication is, the more the child will trust you when problems arise at school etc

Eight: Do not overload children with the dreaded problems that arise in the world or the problems that may exist in other relationships in your life, while it is important that kids be educated about some things i.e not to talk to strangers, it is also important that kids get to be kids because as they begin to grow into teenagers, they will become exposed to a whole new world of pressure and stress.

Nine: Find a balance between being a strict over the top parent, and the do nothing parent. Neither of these are healthy, one makes the child suffocated and may make them act out, the other teaches them that they can get away with anything. The point is be a present part in their lives i.e who are you going with, be home at this time etc but you dont need to know how many piercings their friends have.

Ten: Children are often helpless in volatile situations, make sure you only bring positive people into their lives, if you are a single parent, do not bring threatening people through the door that may make them feel intimidated or uncomfortable. Just because you may feel lonely, do not compromise their health. If you are in a committed relationship, do not bring children into arguments or make them a part of them or the cause, a family works best when there is strong unity and support between parents. Just because you have kids doesn't mean you have to sacrifice date nights etc, it is healthier to find ways to keep them.

I really would love to hear all your comments and experiences about parenting, please share them as i value them so much